John McCain and Ms. Whiplash - Together At Last?

Campaign Finance Reform - A View From Across The Pond
by Mark Lloyd

http://www.opednews.com/

Comprehensive campaign finance reform is, I would contend, the single most important issue facing this country.

You think not? Think it’s Iraq, poverty, corruption, Medicare, Iran, the deficit, the idiots in the White House?

Well you know what? – all of these issues and ills facing the US can be traced to one root cause; the fact that your politicians are in debt to special interest groups.
Bought and sold at every election.

A lot of attention has rightly been focused on K Street and the outrageous takeover of the government and laws of this country by corporations and their interests. Oil industry lobbyists and Ken Lay writing energy legislation? My god!

Well what do you expect? Prez, Vice and a host of others elected with oil money. They OWE them. Come on! Why do you think you’re forking over $3 a gallon? Purleeeze!

Don’t forget that corporations are not interested in a politician’s stripe. They just want their agenda pushed through so they can make as much money as possible, pay as few taxes as possible, with as few rules and regulations constraining them as possible.

They are equal-opportunity bribers. If the Dems get in, they’ll court them in exactly the same way. Do you really believe that the Dems will resist and dismantle K Street just because they have higher principles than the Repugs? Don’t fool yourselves. K Street isn’t the cancer, it’s just the visible part of a much deeper tumor.

Taking back the government for the people will need a great deal more than faith, trust, and voting for one millionaire over another. It requires a return to office of politicians who believe in public service, who get into politics because they want to make a difference for the better, not to get rich.

These people are out there. But they will never get elected. They are unable to stand. Where are they going to get the millions they need to finance a campaign, to buy the TV ads? And even if they got it, who do they owe? How can they be impartial once elected?

It is a self-perpetuating system stacked outrageously in favor of big money and against politicians of principle and the people of America, except the very rich.

McCain-Feingold was a start but hopelessly, woefully inadequate.

In England, we have a different system. I’m not saying it’s perfect, it is very far from that, but it might be worth a look.

First, no candidate is allowed to accept donations from anybody, or any entity. All campaign donations must be sent to the party administrators.

Each candidate is given an amount of money, from party HQ, that they are allowed to spend on their local campaign. It is the same for everyone and regulated by law. This has to cover pamphlets, soapboxes, megaphones, ads in the local media, rental of the school hall, the works. It is a small amount of money. Certainly not enough to pay any salaries. Almost all campaign workers are voluntary. And spin-doctors never work for free as we know.

After the election each candidate has to provide an accounting. If they are a penny over, they’re in trouble.

Meanwhile, anybody can stand in any seat for a $5000 deposit. You get less than 5% of the vote, you lose it. More than 5%, you get it back.

This leads to a wonderful quadrennial spectacle; politicians standing on stage awaiting the announcement of the results, side-by-side with everyone who stood for the seat. It has become part of the culture that all the crazies come out of the woodwork and stand in the Prime Minister’s constituency. He is standing there, can’t help but have a smile on his face, surrounded by the hopefuls. The BBC cameras are poised.

Tony (Labor Party)
The Conservative in his blue suit, white shirt and blue tie.
The Liberal
The Liberal Democrat
The Green

And;

The British National Party blackshirt skinhead dude (read; British KKK)
Ms Whiplash (Dominatrix Party) (I’m not kidding).
The Nazi
The Communist
The Rastaman
The guy dressed as the pope
And (god rest his soul) Screamin’ Lord Sutch of the Official Monster Raving Looney Party, resplendent as ever in striped top hat, Willy Wonka morning coat and an OMRLP rosette almost as big as him. This dude stood in every PM’s constituency race since 1972. He shared the stage with them all. Heath; Callaghan: Kinnock: Thatcher: Major; Blaaauurrgghhh; and rarely lost his five grand.

Rarely lost his five grand. What does that say? RIP Screamin’, I loved you baby……

Everyone gets Reprazented. Nobody shuffles off stage and shoots up abortion clinics or beats up gays. And the nine guys who voted Nazi crack a beer, crank up the Wagner and celebrate two new friends because last year they only got seven.

And Tony Blair goes back to business – with a pretty good feel for his home town.

Meanwhile, the major parties are allocated equal airtime on the national TV networks, based on previous proportion of votes received. Each is clearly prefaced. “The following is a party political broadcast on behalf of the Conservative Party”. No PACS, no swiftboating. Sure there’s insults and character slurs, but when they’ve only got five minutes a day, real issues take priority.

The public are unscrewed. They vote informatively. And the election has cost them nothing but a few extra Euros on sickbags.

And yes, sometimes they still end up with representatives that are complete dicks. But they know one thing for sure – he’s not in hock to anyone. He’s their dick.

Hey America, I ain’t preaching. No system’s perfect. But I know what I’ll be thinking when the November campaign is in full swing.

When I’m watching the next Swiftboat ad authored by Rove and paid for by backdoor Exxon money siphoned through the Christian Coalition, I’ll be thinking of Screamin’ Lord Sutch tickling Joe Lieberman’s ribs with a feather duster.

When I’m watching John McCain “interviewed” by some sycophantic rightwing talkshow host, I’ll be dreaming of him being crushed in congratulation to Ms Whiplash’s ample bosom on a crude hardwood stage in a crumbling school hall.

Film that Fox. It’s called democracy.

Mark Lloyd is a working stiff in Minneapolis. He grew up in Yorkshire, England during the socialist 70's and Thatcher & Reagan's 80's and disliked both mobs. His fierce interest in politics, history and The Truth combined with the appalling start to the 21st century have finally convinced him to start writing again.

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