Things to do in Crawford When He's Dead: A Bedtime Story About Bush and Saddam

" `Please,' Bush whimpers, his lips pursed in mock desperation, `don't kill me,' "
- Excerpts from The Houston Chronicle August 10, 1999

Sometimes the tiniest details are the most fascinating.

As Saddam Hussein was being held accountable (by the neck) for some of the murders he ordered in Iraq, back in Crawford, at Screw Up Central, the Unaccountable One was asleep in his bed. Furthermore, Bush was not awakened with the news when the deed was done.
Or so the White House says.

So...the President was sound asleep at 9 o'clock Central Screw Up time? Because the official word was broadcast shortly after 10pm eastern time, and we have to assume the White House knew before it was released to the press. I know it's hard work being the Decider, especially after a week of having to be the Listener, too, but 9 o'clock? When the man you went to war to overthrow was about to hang by a noose?
All evening long, millions of Americans were glued to their tv sets after the word got out that the hanging was imminent. And we know how comfortable the President is with executions; he presided over more than 150 of them when he was governor of Texas, and he did do that perfectly hi-larious imitation of Karla Faye Tucker begging for her life. So if staying up past 9 was too much, you'd think he would at least leave orders for a "wake me when he's dead" call. But no, the White House spokesman said.
Do you believe this bedtime story? It is certainly consistent with Bush's handling of every other crisis he's been confronted with at the "ranch," from ignoring the pre 9/11 PDB warning about Bin Laden in August 2001, to loafing half-assed through the first days after the tsunami in December 2004, to completely blowing the preparation for Katrina in August 2005.
But I think it's just another Bush lie. Either he wanted the world to believe that his conscience was clear, and he could sleep peacefully through Saddam's execution, or he didn't want to appear to be too involved, because, after all, it was an Iraqi trial, conducted by the Iraqi government.
It is very hard to imagine how the execution of Saddam Hussein doesn't fill Iraq's bloody streets with even more carnage. Dozens of Shiites were killed in car bombings Saturday, and the deaths of six more Americans were announced. December is now the bloodiest month of the year for Americans--109 killed.

If, as persistent leaks indicate, 20 thousand more troops are about to be sent to Iraq, it'll just be another case of Bush asking other people to clean up his mess. It should be Bush and his state department who do the hard work of ending his war, not American servicemen and women sent in on an ill-defined and probably impossible mission.

As John Podesta, Lawrence Korb and Brian Katulis at American Progress wrote last week, we need a new political and diplomatic surge, not a new military surge.

You know, Bush told People magazine this month that he sleeps "a lot better than people would assume."

But I have to wonder how he ever sleeps at night.

Shelley Lewis is author of Naked Republicans, a Full-frontal Exposure of Right-wing Hypocrisy and Greed.