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Saturday, May 01, 2010

A Disgusting Little Email Making the Rounds on Wall Street

This hideous little piece of class warfare is supposedly making the rounds on Wall Street today. Its Us-Vs-Them theme is sickening. The lobbies of JPMorgan and several other banks were flooded with protesters downtown yesterday, I'm guessing that this was written by a frustrated Wall Streeter in response to the populist uprising.
Here goes:
"We are Wall Street. It's our job to make money. Whether it's a commodity, stock, bond, or some hypothetical piece of fake paper, it doesn't matter. We would trade baseball cards if it were profitable. I didn't hear America complaining when the market was roaring to 14,000 and everyone's 401k doubled every 3 years. Just like gambling, its not a problem until you lose. I've never heard of anyone going to Gamblers Anonymous because they won too much in Vegas.
Well now the market crapped out, & even though it has come back somewhat, the government and the average Joes are still looking for a scapegoat. God knows there has to be one for everything. Well, here we are.
Go ahead and continue to take us down, but you're only going to hurt yourselves. What's going to happen when we can't find jobs on the Street anymore? Guess what: We're going to take yours. We get up at 5am & work till 10pm or later. We're used to not getting up to pee when we have a position. We don't take an hour or more for a lunch break. We don't demand a union. We don't retire at 50 with a pension. We eat what we kill, and when the only thing left to eat is on your dinner plates, we'll eat that.
For years teachers and other unionized labor have had us fooled. We were too busy working to notice. Do you really think that we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping? We're going to take your cushy jobs with tenure and 4 months off a year and whine just like you that we are so-o-o-o underpaid for building the youth of America. Say goodbye to your overtime and double time and a half. I'll be hitting grounders to the high school baseball team for $5k extra a summer, thank you very much.
So now that we're going to be making $85k a year without upside, Joe Mainstreet is going to have his revenge, right? Wrong! Guess what: we're going to stop buying the new 80k car, we aren't going to leave the 35 percent tip at our business dinners anymore. No more free rides on our backs. We're going to landscape our own back yards, wash our cars with a garden hose in our driveways. Our money was your money. You spent it. When our money dries up, so does yours.
The difference is, you lived off of it, we rejoiced in it. The Obama administration and the Democratic National Committee might get their way and knock us off the top of the pyramid, but it's really going to hurt like hell for them when our fat a**es land directly on the middle class of America and knock them to the bottom.
We aren't dinosaurs. We are smarter and more vicious than that, and we are going to survive. The question is, now that Obama & his administration are making Joe Mainstreet our food supply…will he? and will they?" LinkHere

Joe Mainstreets Reply

Dear Mr. "Sh*t-Don't-Stink" Trader,
While the forcefulness with which you speak will likely cause people
to nod their heads as they listen, a quick dissection of your points
will show them to be the fantasies of a narrow-minded individual with
an inflated opinion of their place in this world. In other words, you
remind us a lot of this guy:
"We are Wall Street. It's our job to make money."
You can't possibly believe that you have the right to make money any
way you see fit, regardless of the impact it has on the people around
you. If we determine that the choices of a business are negatively
impacting human society, we regulate their behavior with the goal of
preventing future harm. When choosing between the bottom line and
quality of life, we choose quality of life. That goes for cigarette
companies, that goes for auto manufacturers, that goes for Wall
Street. Yes, there is a risk of over-regulating and doing more harm
than good, but taking that risk is better than letting the harmful
behavior continue as is, unchecked.
"We're going to take your jobs!"
The fact that you actually believe the talents of a trader are the
same talents required to do any job out there (especially a teacher or
a landscaper) are proof that you are woefully unprepared to do our
jobs, let alone do them well. The fact that your current salary is
higher than ours does not mean you are better equipped to do our job.
You believe that your value as a human can be equated to a dollar
figure like your income because that is what your industry has taught
you. We believe that is precisely why you need to be regulated. You
are one sick f*ck.
"No more free rides on our backs"
Has your absorption with money created the delusion that you are the
one actually producing it? The unemployment rate is over 10%, and you
think that the loss of your "upside" will have a significant
incremental impact on us? That is like the fast food industry
thinking that if they go out of business we won't have any more food.
You don't make the money, stupid. You just move it around. That is a
fact that we learned very painfully when all that imaginary value you
helped create disappeared.
In summary, bring it on. We are not worried about you. We'll even
hire you to landscape our gardens.
Joe Mainstreet LinkHere


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